Growed Up Me

Some mornings as I quietly pad around my kitchen and brew my coffee,
I look around my house and think,
"How did I get here?
This is SO much better than I could have ever imagined."

Some days I want to go back to 15 year old Stacy and say:
"Your life will be better than you could ever imagine in 17 years!
Don't take yourself so seriously,
breathe a bit more
and forget the haters."

But I doubt I would listen to myself.
And would I be here if I hadn't been so uptight?
and not been scarred by those haters?

Maybe all that crazy worrying of 15 year old Stacy
got me to the Zen place of 32 year old Stacy.

I know people have said that everything works together for good
... But it really does.
And as someone looking back at their life right now,
I see that it actually works out BETTER than good.
It works out to amazingness!

So hold on 15 year old Stacy!
You are doing just fine
and life just gets better and better
Than you can even imagine!

I wonder what 70 year old Stacy would say about that?

Worst Day Better

So I had a bad day today.

One of those days where you cry the entire way home from work ... Even though your 4 year old is sitting in the back.

One of those days where you realize you are making a wrong turn and instead of just laughing it off - you cry even harder .... Even though your 4 year old is sitting in the back.

One of those days that when you hear someone's voice on the other end of the phone - you can't even talk because you are crying so hard... Even though your 4 year old is in the back.

And then ... from the 4 year old in the back:

"Mommy? Here! (passes me a Smartie)

What's wrong? If you are still sad about school, you just need to not think about it! You aren't there right now! That's what I do ... and then I forget about it forever. Get your mind off of it. Look!!!!! The sun is shining through the clouds! Isn't that pretty?"

My worst day just got better ... From a 4 year old in the back.

Orange Chicken Vacation & Arrows

I read this book by John Eldridge awhile back ... more like years back. It was called "The Sacred Romance". It changed my life.

One of the chapters addressed how things happen to you in your life and they are like an arrow that shoots into your soul - creating a wound.

And then it seems like once you have this, any hurts that happen to you will continue to deepen this original wound until you have a very deep, painful wound that a lot of your hurts can be traced back to.

I have one of those arrows wounds.

And boy oh boy, just when I thought that this wound had been dealt with and healed and moved on from ... I realize I was wrong.

It is back with a vengeance - strangely brought on by a vacation in paradise and a post vacation meal of Orange Chicken.


But I know that this time around this is just a wound.
I won't be downtrodden.
I will choose to RISE!


"Rise"

[Chorus]
Yes I will rise
Out of these ashes rise
From this trouble I have found
And this rubble on the ground
I will rise
Cause He Who is in me
Is greater than I will ever be
And I will rise

Sometimes my heart is on the ground
And hope is nowhere to be found
Love is a figment I once knew
And yet I hold on to what I know is true

[Chorus]
Yes I will rise
Out of these ashes rise
From this trouble I have found
And this rubble on the ground
I will rise
Cause He Who is in me
Is greater than I will ever be
And I will rise

Well I keep on coming to this place
That I don't know quite how to face
So I lay down my life in hopes to die
That somehow I might rise

[Chorus]
Yes I will rise
Out of these ashes rise
From this trouble I have found
And this rubble on the ground
I will rise
Cause He Who is in me
Is greater than I will ever be
And I will rise

Thank you Shawn McDonald for some lyrics to cling to.
Especially on vacation and in the midst of my Orange Chicken meal.

Quotes of the Week

We were at a jewelry store yesterday getting our watches fixed.
While I was waiting for the employee to come and help me, M and I were admiring the different things in the display cases.
M was staring into this case of beautifully huge diamond rings. He turned to me and said:

"Momma? I'm gonna get this for my woman someday when I get married."




A few days ago, Brad was painting some chairs for our backyard.
They were originally black, but were being painted a pretty metallic silver color.
M looked at B and said,

"Daddy!! I love that paint!
Those are the prettiest things I have ever seen.
They are so beautiful, it makes me want to cry."


Hilarious
and
Sweet

Are you KIDDING ME?!??

Just a few moments ago, I was sitting in my chair reading a book.
I heard MTM's booby-trapped door open pretty quietly.

I had literally gone to check on him 10 minutes before and he was out cold.
So I was wondering what he could possibly want.

He usually comes to the top of the stairs and tells us if he needs something.
But this time, he didn't come.

So I put my book down and went up the stairs to see what he needed.
I heard him rummaging around in his playroom.
(Which was really weird because he NEVER goes in there at night).

I looked into the playroom to see what he was doing and saw:

a 4 year old boy
pants around the ankles
standing over his matchbox cars
laughing
and
peeing
full-force.

I said, "M!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!???"
and he just kept laughing and peeing.

I realized that he was sleep-walking so I called for backups.
Ironically, B was an avid sleep-walking pee-er and felt some sympathy for the little guy.
Sometime in the cleanup, M woke up and said, "I thought I was in the bathroom!"

Like Father.
Like Son.

Cute when you're 4.
Not so cute when you're 16.